Looking In

Posted on September 13, 2009 by Ronald T. Brown, Ph.D.

The degree to which we develop our self-awareness will significantly influence our success in life.

Warren Bennis writes, “Only when we know what we are made of can we begin our lives.”

Self-awareness is where leadership development begins - for ever greater levels of self-understanding will enable us to lead ourselves, and others, in more authentic and meaningful ways.

The following are ways to develop self-awareness

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1) Stop blaming others for your behavior. You always have a choice how you respond and behave. How do you tend to blame others for your unhealthy behaviors?

2) Take a personality assessment to help gain more perspective regarding how you are wired.

3) Get feedback from significant people who know you well. This can be uncomfortable for both of you, but it is the fastest method for gaining a better understanding of your strengths and limitations.

4) Seek out a coach or mentor. Someone who sees you in action - and can help you become a better version of yourself.

5) Understand that your biggest irritations look a lot like you. If something irritates you, it may be because you have the same tendency/habit yourself.

6) Look beneath your behavior to discern your assumptions about life. What assumptions are driving your healthy and unhealthy behaviors?

7) Asses what seems to be limiting your growth and success. How may you be giving those roadblocks too much control or power in your life?.

8) A regular occurrence of negative interactions with others tend to signal a selfish attitude in your life.

9) Each night, reflect back on your behavior.

Ask questions like

: How did I handle difficulties? What did I think or do when I don’t get my way? How adaptive was I? Did I control my emotions? Did I judge other people and create conflict? How did others relate to me? What hindered my showing love today?

10) Record your thoughts and experiences in a personal journal. It is one of the best ways to capture what is going on around you - and inside you.

11) Make note of the causal remarks people make about you.

12) Read books and go to seminars that help you rethink your assumptions, and address problem areas - and blind spots - in your life.

13) Consider the words you have used lately. Your words mean a lot. The words you use reflect your thinking and attitudes. Your thoughts and choices have brought you to where you are now, and your thoughts and choices will determine where you end up in the future.

** Being self–awarene is difficult. But admit your need to continually grow by asking yourself, “What are my next steps to grow both personally and professionally?”